hip hip...

hooray.
I have internet and cable at my house...

and the peasants rejoiced.


The sun is out again today... which always makes for a good day.
As long as I have reasons to find joy, I'll keep embracing those moments!

clarity in confusion

For so long I have been struggling with inner-peace. I've not been too happy with myself... I don't have a job.. that's the big one. I don't feel like I am contributing anything to society at this point. I have an unbelievable girlfriend.. she is everything that I need... she knows how to love me exactly how I need to be loved... in saying that, I feel like a dead-beat who is incapable of being a provider... For a single mother with three children, that has to be pretty scary. I know I have other things to offer her, just as I know I have things to offer society in some sort of vocation... I do not understand why the hundreds of resume's I've put out has had very little kick-back. I don't understand why I can't pay my bills despite my faithfulness and obedience. I don't understand why there has been so many hard issues that have come our way... If I told you every single thing that Jennifer and I have been through I believe you would be surprised that one of us hasn't had a nervous break-down at this point.
I refuse to believe that God does not have a plan for us.
I refuse to believe that God does not have a plan for me.
I refuse to stay discouraged.
I feel God using me.
I feel God molding me.
I feel God breaking me.
I am humbled.

guess who's coming back to the wings!!

okay the last post was a hoax... sorry.. I got some awesome reactions though... this time it's real... Darren McCarty is going to be a Red Wing again... and that makes me happy.

guess who's engaged!!

sunny days

what is it about the weather that can change your mood? The sun was shining today... it made me happy.

dogs again

i love these pooches.

again

stuck.

i hate michigan winters... maybe I wouldn't hate them so much if this particular winter didn't have the abundance of snow/ice/frozen roads/frozen cars/getting stuck in unplowed/unshoveled driveways. I remember last winter getting stuck a few times with my passat and figured that this winter would be fine with my mighty, new grand prix... I am humbled.

I've never been so tempted to want to move.
I've never been so tempted to curse.
I've never been so tempted to trade this piece of crap in for something with 4-wheel-drive.

okay, so if I just didn't have to drive in this God-forsaken weather it wouldn't be half as bad... maybe I could somewhat appreciate a small portion of it's beauty... I'm sure I'd still find more things to complain about... like how cold it is and how my feet and hands and ears and nose are never warm...

the more I think about it, the more I realize that the piles of snow outside are really the least of my worries... I think deep down, if I feel like I can vent about something that's a minor inconvenience, then I feel better about the major inconveniences that are really affecting me... inconveniences that I can't really come out and say...

I wish life had an easy-button.

stuck

so... I was leaving my dad's house this morning and couldn't get my car out of the driveway... this is the second time in less than a week that I've gotten my car stuck... so here I sit... waiting for someone to push me out of the snow...
Spring, where are you?

brand new

check out my new music myspace page... if you're on myspace, feel free to add me as a friend.

the things you love will end up destroying you

it's silly really... but it says so much...

3 reasons why I love/miss my brother

1) He now has a beard




2) He steals funny hats and wears them




3) He picks people's noses after only knowing them for a week

Come home soon Nick

dog-sitting

I've been watching my friend's dogs this weekend... meet Lola (blonde) and Franklin (black). It didn't take long for them to find their way into my heart. They have been the best company I could ask for... I can't wait to do this again!!

disclaimer*

I know the last few months I've posted a lot of things that may seem like my life is one big ball of discouragement... it isn't... I have a blessed life. There are so many things that I am thankful for, but when I'm feeling down, I feel like getting my feelings out there is very therapeutic...

thanks for reading... (:

sometimes...

...my girlfriend likes to send me pix messages to my cell phone... just to let me know she's thinking about me.... (:

something

it really is something... everything that's happened in my life over the past 6 months or so. Sometimes when I think about it, I feel like I'm trapped in a vat of seaweed struggling to find daylight... just because it seems to never end... so I try not to think about that too much.
it really is something... sometimes it feels like time is moving on, progressing, and the people that mean the most to me (my family) are regressing... life shouldn't be about this... this isn't what God intended.
I know that the God I serve is in the business of making beautiful things out of broken things... so to this promise I cling... I put my hope there and I find comfort in some serene way... I have found peace within myself... it really is something.

(sigh) 2008

here's to another year...
I look forward to better things this time around... 2007 kinda sucked.

repressed childhood memory

I was hanging out with Jenn and her boys a few nights ago when one of them asked me a question... I don't remember exactly what the question was, but it was one that had an obvious answer... not really a rhetorical question, but one more like this: "Eric, is the moon made of cheese?"
Now, that wasn't the question he asked, but it was something that he obviously knew the correct answer to... at that moment a distant, foggy memory came rushing to my brain... and I immediately began laughing.
When Andrea and I were kids and would ask ridiculous questions like this, my mom and dad would say: "what do you think?" and we'd answer the 'obvious' question correctly... at that point my mother and father both would reply: "very good retarded child."
The more I thought about this, the more I laughed... I couldn't believe my parents called us retarded, but I remember laughing about it back then too... but I don't know why I would have thought that to be funny back then as an impressionable, fragile young boy...
Upon further investigation, I asked my dad about this scarring detail in my life... he immediately began to laugh uncontrollably. He told me the 'very good retarded child' line was a punch-line to a joke that he and my mom heard around that time and then just always used it around Andrea and I to make us laugh...
Don't think that my parents would call their children retards... on second thought, that could explain so much...... (:

sometimes

there is just nothing to write about.

I hate winter

my car got stuck today and the blower is broken... so no heat and no de-fog... perfect.
I'm so glad I bought a new car that doesn't even work.
I'm selling it and getting something with 4-wheel drive I decided this morning... I might change my mind here in a few minutes... we'll see.

thankfulness series: post three

with you I'm spoiled, without you I'm soiled...